A constant theme throughout the book is the idea that the ideologies of the changing culture have redefined how romance is approached in the modern age. Most notably, modern singles are looking for their soul mate. In previous generations, people often looked for a spouse that would fulfill their socially defined gender role: Men wanted women who would be good mothers and home keepers, while women desired men who could financially provide for the family. Today, those gender roles aren’t as rigidly defined, especially in the United States where many women go to college and have a career, activities that used to be unheard of. Because many women have become financially and socially independent, women are looking for true love instead of a husband with an ability to provide.

When Ansari spoke to women from older generations, many of them lamented the fact that they didn’t get a period of independence. During that time, women were expected to live at home under the authority of their parents until they got married. It was expected that women would marry young and start having children immediately. This is vastly different today, especially with the rise of the modern phenomenon called