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The Wife Between Us

Sarah Pekkanen, Greer Hendricks

The Wife Between Us

Sarah Pekkanen, Greer Hendricks

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The Wife Between Us Themes

The Relationship Between Control and Abuse

Hendricks and Pekkanen elucidate the many subtle and startling ways control turns abusive. Richard’s obsessive need for control reveals itself gradually in the text, just as Vanessa only comes to realize it over time. The battle for control—Richard’s control of Vanessa and of their story, and Vanessa’s desperation to reclaim it—infuses the narrative with heightened tension and acts as the novel’s overarching conflict. By highlighting the ways in which abuse manifests early in a relationship, the novel comments on the nuanced methods abusers undertake.

Richard’s control first begins with nicknaming Vanessa “nervous Nellie” (160). This seemingly endearing act commandeers her identity, belittling her to a single trait. Richard works to maintain his power through psychological and emotional abuse: He buys her a phone to keep tabs on her, pushes her to quit her job, pressures her to quit drinking, and calls her anonymously and hangs up. When this fails to control Vanessa, he escalates his tactics to more overtly recognizable forms of abuse: gaslighting, undermining her public image, and physical assault. Richard’s intention is to mold Vanessa into his ideal wife—one who acts just as he wants her to.

One of Richard’s most effective ways of controlling Vanessa is by telling her she’s “acting crazy” when she confronts him.

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