Simon “Sick Boy” narrates walking with Mark. While Simon wants to chase girls, Mark is less interested. When an overweight girl blocks Simon’s view of an attractive girl’s VPL, visible panty line, he remarks: “[‘]There’s a slim chicky![’] Ah sarcastically observe” to which Mark responds, “Fuck off ya sexist cunt” (28).

Two English girls ask the boys for directions to a theater; the girls are in town for the Edinburgh Festival. Mark surprises Simon by speaking with apparent knowledge on theater and plays, and the girls seem impressed. Simon thinks Mark is useful after all. The girls agree to meet Mark and Simon for a drink later. Simon is annoyed by Mark’s intellectual discussion and leaves him: “Ah shake off Rents, he can go kill himself with drugs. Some fucking friends I have” (30). He concludes that he is sick of all his friends and walks off while having an imaginary conversation with his idol, Sean Connery.

Told in the third person, this chapter introduces the reader to Nina, Mark’s niece. The young teenaged woman is joining her family in mourning following the death of her Uncle Andy—although she can’t really join their grieving. She is more focused on the fact that she’s about to get her period than her grief.